Imaginary Conversations

Death

A: My parents died three years ago, of course.

B: I am so sorry.

A: It's ok. It wasn't your fault…or was it?


Picking Up the Check

A: Of course I got it, don't worry.

B: Are you sure? (Feinting for wallet)

A: You're right, you should probably get this one.


An Honest Flight Attendant

A: In the event of a water landing, of course, everyone will die. According to Wikipedia, no commercial aircraft has ever made a successful water landing. Life vests are here for your placebic enjoyment…also your Ipod shuffle can bring this $100 million plane down.


An Honest State Department Official

A: Of course we support Israel. They have hot women in their military. Syria, try showing some skin…


An Honest Wall Street Analyst

A: Of course I trade on insider information.


An Honest Consultant

A: Of course there are no synergies or savings--we are working for fees.


An Honest Parent

A: Of course I have a favorite child.


An Honest Child

A: Here is your change back



from » what-others-can-you-think-of dept

3 comments:

  1. Karl has never heard those words from an honest OR dishonest parent, or grandmother.

    I'm just being honest.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i didn't know your parents died 3 years ago.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The first three made me literally chortle out loud...or did I titter? Either way, well done.

    ReplyDelete